"Sorry you did not match"

Today is the day that we got an email notifying us if we Matched a program on our rank list or would we have to participate in the scramble. Nobody knows until Thursday where they match but the email is to provide some kind of reassurance or provoke severe anxiety and prepare you for hell. Unfortunately for me, I got the "bad email" that said, "Sorry you did not match a program on your rank list" and so here I am preparing for the Scramble. Basically they release any unfilled programs (which is only 5 for OBGYN in the entire COUNTRY!!)and all of us who didn't match will be calling and faxing our application. Its dreadful and horrible and its not where I envisioned myself. In fact I feel like the past 6 months of the application process has been a waste..all that money traveling, etc has gotten me no where. I didn't go to med school to be a different kind of doctor, OBGYN is the only thing I want. I'm totally depressed. I'm really scared. My biggest fear is not being an OBGYN, my second fear is that Billy and I will be forced to separate. I'm trying to cheer up but i'm still grieving. The scramble starts tomorrow so I'll pull it together by then, but this totally, totally sucks!!